Love is all around you, seeping
From the essence of your God-force,
Waiting for you to show up
In all ways.
This world will not reject you.
Only you can do that
In your choices,
In your unmet desires, in your
Yearning for those
Who cannot see you.
When you try to hide from the truth,
When you isolate yourself to protect
Your self-fulfilling fears, it only creates
More suffering.
And the world loses,
In the end.
Because your gifts
Are meant to serve us all.
Awakened
With one look, one memory,
Into a spiral of dharma.
On destiny’s map, I found love
In molten rock,
Monuments and mountains,
Portals and raging waterfalls,
Testaments to the gods.
I found purpose
In bare feet,
Movement of muscles and the glow
Of exposed skin and deep breaths,
Pages upon pages of writings
On destiny and desire.
We stayed within our boxes, but
My walls were crumbling,
And sacred contracts became
Invisible lines. Freedom,
The true love that reaches her hand
Begging you to jump. Waiting,
Always waiting.
Always waiting.
Never leaving.
Yet while this world grows lighter,
Other walls grow stronger.
Somewhere in my silent reflections
On longing,
Duty became an impenetrable fortress,
No longer in my memory,
But deeply in yours.
While I’ve been harnessing power
Within,
Other sources are so freely given,
And invisible lines become stern ships
Making waves
That want to drown me.
I can no longer cross that line,
Nor will I submit to shame.
I took the hand of freedom,
Of LOVE
When I chose ME.
These boxes of separation
do not belong in my reality.
They’re designed to keep you apart
From who you really are,
What you really want,
And can last a lifetime if you let them.
(And you might.)-
But I’m done waiting.
I made my choice, long ago,
The moment I decided to come here
For love.
Life becomes uneasy.
The ground, once so steady,
Now shakes with every step.
So you reach
For the quick fix.
The possibility of recreating
What was
Instead of what could have been.
Every choice is a door.
Every door leads down a path.
Every path is your design.
So choose bravely. Choose beauty.
Pursue the dream.
Take risks for
The great love.
Give from your heart
Your many gifts.
Discover heaven, here,
On this orbiting rock.
Don’t wait for the what ifs to
Consume your every thought.
The unfamiliar is scary.
The uncertain outcome seems an
Impossible feat
For the contracted heart.
But the reward of a new way, a crack
In the chiseled armor,
Clearing away clouds of separation
And old stories
Is why you are here.
It’s the story of your awakening.
I don’t think the rain ever touched us.
Maybe it was soaked in our hair, droplets sliding off our coats.
There were always rainbows, waterfalls, Iceland weather on summer walks.
I remember it rained,
But I don’t remember the rain itself.
Instead I hear the sound of laughter,
Smiles I can’t contain,
Words I can’t speak,
Rushing rivers,
My heartbeat.
How can I not run outside,
Searching for rainbows?
The air, she is
a fickle sprite.
Forever moving, shifting, embracing
her own unfolding story.
Unable to be swayed, grasped, guided
by other than her own song.
Her love will engulf you, wholly.
But her invitations will disappear as
quickly as they came.
Unattached. Free.
She slips away unseen.
Wisps passing over moonlight.
Vibrating leaves.
The flutter of butterfly wings.
Dancing reeds.
Follow her whispers
before they fade among the trees.
The years pass by like days now,
yet we’re still waiting for the thaw.
This is the last time,
I’ve told myself a thousand times.
but then the ice begins to melt,
and hope arises, or some
glimpse of karmic memory.
An unbreakable cord connecting
this life with the last,
and then a thousand more.
We imagine the what ifs, the untold life
with different puzzle pieces.
Not necessarily better,
but connected, infused
with fantasy and dreams
played out in familiar realms.
We’re getting older now,
and yet more beautiful.
Distant yet deeply connected
by memories. By love.
By hidden truths and emotions
laced in poetic metaphor.
Through our many disciplined choices,
responsibilities, disappointment,
and a thousand promises,
I remember it all.
It wasn’t me who tempted Adam into the Maya.
He made that decision long ago.
And I followed him for love,
Because we are of the same flesh and bone.
It was me who wanted to remember.
To have inner sight beyond the illusion,
A beckoning to Truth.
It was me who wanted to remember bliss
In the taste of an apple,
Fleshy sweetness against my tongue,
Nectar at the back of my throat.
I wanted to remember God
In every felt experience,
To discover the sublime
Beyond the mirror.
He thought the apple would bring suffering,
That it was easier to forget.
But for our love, I couldn’t forget.
Even if I spend an entire life seeking,
Even if he never remembers,
I will follow the serpent’s call to awaken.
Doors opening doors to more doors,
Shedding skin after skin,
Divine love forever fueling my spirit.
My soul is complete,
Whole and integrated.
Not a fragment of two
Or yearning for the half.
I am both shadow and light
The moon and the sun
The leaves and the roots.
I create from the one flow.
Co-creating with Divinity,
She is me, and I am her.
She is all that lives within.
I am not seeking God
From gurus or altered realities.
The All is where I am.
Every polarity
And universal truth
exist in me.
I am Eternal Love
Whole and complete.
Can you love yourself
Exactly as you are?
Can you wipe away the tears of pain
When you were not enough
Or too much?
Can you see your beauty
As clearly as the imperfections?
Can you see yourself
As I see you?
Will you allow the fear of rejection
To keep you from true intimacy?
Will you allow the past to shame you
Into complacency?
Will you tear down the barriers
To vulnerability?
Can you surrender control
And let the mother in
To hold you
The father
To guide you?
Can you love yourself
As I love you?
A jolt of awareness awakens Shiva from his cosmic throne,
Surges of lightening, a glimpse of union
Arising from the temple Maya.
When the sensations fade, he seeks outwardly,
Grasping for any experience that brings him closer to his beloved.
A taste of nectar,
The forbidden fruit.
Shielded by the tapestries of human experience,
Until he remembers the light within.
The serpent Shakti awakens to the creative internal force,
Singing her song for her beloved to hear.
How long have I allowed myself to be seduced by the glimmer of Maya?
How long have I sought comfort in my own illusions,
By the light of Venus rising,
Waiting to be validated by a web of my creation?
As Shiva turns his expansive gaze within,
Shakti feels herself begin to uncoil.
Time’s wounds untangling from the web, often painful to witness.
She ascends, he descends.
And a new web begins to form,
Connecting the temple within to the universe without.
They dance, they retract.
They experience divinity, then find the familiar.
They know, yet they are blind.
They are love, yet can only desire what they know of the self,
An experience unfolding with every breath and act of devotion.
An experience that could take many incarnations across dimensions of time.
It began from one thread of creation, a spark, a flash,
And weaved into a complex and ecstatic dance of polarities.
The spark that was one, became two,
Only to become one again.
A journey of experience, involution to evolution,
Illusion to awakening,
Duality to union,
Divine inspiration.
Freedom may be my passion
and changing my mind is easy.
But my heart,
my heart
seeks only devotion.
Devotion
is what fuels my desire,
the willingness to stand in stability,
to prioritize Love over all.
Devotion
is what keeps me up at night with longing.
I will forever follow its call,
like moth to flame,
ready to be consumed.
(Except I am the wind created by wings
dissolving into a gust of breeze.)
When devotion is present,
when dedication and commitment are the offering,
it’s all I can see.
When Love is the promise,
it’s all I can feel.
Everything else is just a game.
You have to be willing to offer everything you have
to receive everything you want.
Hands out, heart open,
focused only on that which is Love.
